maybe it's not my weekend

some pics from tina/tucker visit

2012-01-06T03:38:00.004-07:00

it's been a while

2012-01-03T22:21:00.003-07:00

wow, i haven't posted a blog in a long time- not that anyone reads them or i ever posted anything super amazing ... anyways, i'm done with school! NAU at least. i graduated on december 16th. my aunt and cousin came to AZ from NY the day before commencement and have been here since then. they leave on thursday and i have been cherishing every moment that they've been here. i can already feel the tears welling up inside me just thinking about having to say goodbye again. it's so hard having family that isn't close. i'll put up some pictures here from their visit when i can.

as i already mentioned, i am done with school. for now at least. most likely i'll go to grad school someday but not now. i have been doing a little job searching but not much since my aunt and cousin are here. my condo is almost ready, i might even get to move in next week but we'll see how that goes.

one more thing- yesterday marked 15 years that my grammy has been gone.

If tears could build a stairway,

And memories a lane,

I’d walk right up to Heaven

And bring you home again

valentine's day/ grammy's birthday

2011-02-14T20:11:00.002-07:00

i have had some decent valentine's days and some not so decent (down right terrible) ones. but no matter how good or bad it is, there's always an ache in my heart. this year it's especially bad. i miss her terribly. and every year, we let balloons go for her. but since i had to come back to school today, i had to let one go by myself, without the rest of my family.

middle of november

2010-11-19T16:20:00.001-07:00

and it's 75 degrees in phoenix.

amazing.

as was HP7- part 1.

PHOENIX

2010-11-13T13:29:00.001-07:00

View all Josh Sundquist tour dates

jam-packed few weekends

2010-10-29T13:03:00.002-07:00

1. halloween weekend! even though i have to work tomorrow, i still have a halloween party tonight, a halloween/birthday party tomorrow night, then trick-or-treating with the kids on sunday!

2. i'm going to the marine corps ball next thursday! flying in that morning and staying until sunday. i'll only be about an hour and 20 minutes away from disney... interesting...

3. going to florida! we are surprising my uncle for his 40th birthday.

i. am. excited.

20.

2010-10-15T02:37:00.002-07:00

all day people were asking me, "so has anything changed now that you're 20?" or "do you feel different now?" and all i had to say was "no, nothing has changed. i feel the same."

but as i drove home on deer valley road all the way from desert ridge after seeing the midnight premier of jackass 3D (hilarious btw) with my windows down and music up in the almost too-perfect weather, i realized this: 20 can be different if i want it to be.

i will no longer dwell on the past. i will no longer be angry at the person who hurt me the most. i will make an effort to meet new people. i will make an effort to stay close to the people that have meant the most to me, even if it means i will have to face the emotions that i want to run away from. i will never again lose myself no will i let a boy take over my life.

so the next time someone asks me if i feel any different now that i've been alive for two whole decades, i will say, "yes."

why

2010-09-22T17:17:00.002-07:00

does the rain keep hiding from me? it rained while i was sleeping in phoenix. and now it's been raining while i've been in class. all i have gotten to see is the spots on my windshield and the puddles on the ground.

dear rain,

i would love to see you. to hear you. to feel you. so please, stop avoiding me.

it is so WINDY

2010-08-30T12:57:00.002-07:00

and over 40 degrees cooler than what i got used to during my summer.

even though i'm only two hours away, i already miss home.

i haven't even gone to my first class yet. not til 2.

so i guess i'll have more to say once i actually begin the school year lol.

i want to have a night like this

2010-08-10T15:15:00.000-07:00

one more month of my last summer.

2010-07-28T15:13:00.003-07:00

all this not getting scheduled has made me dread going to work when someone asks me to take their shift. i mean, i need the money but i hate going to work. i need to find yet another job. i haven't been really looking though. i feel like i won't be able to find another job that lets me come back for winter and summer break. and i don't want to get a job in flagstaff. if i do, i will probably have to work on the weekends. then when will i get to see my boyfriend? i hate this long distance thing, i really really do. especially when i have to go back up to flagstaff for school.

there are so many things i wish i could change or do differently but i just can't...

Remember Me

2010-06-27T17:25:00.002-07:00

if you haven't seen it, you need to.

i know what you're thinking... "but it has R-Patts in it- instant FAIL"

but the thing is, he's actually a human being in this movie, not a pale sparkly fairy. i mean vampire.

seriously, it was not what i was expecting at all. i don't want to ruin it for anyone so just watch it!

on a sad note- summer seems to be slipping away faster and faster. but there's still time to make it memorable.

2010-04-28T16:50:00.002-07:00

i will be so grateful when next friday comes. first of all, it will be the first full day of summer. second of all, i get to see my baby again! this month has been so hard and seems like it's dragging on forever. but we've been working through it and i know that all the tough things we have to go through now will only make us stronger in the future.

i am so ready to spend the summer at home. even though i go home like every weekend, i still miss the hot sun and my swimming pool and my own bed.

formspring.me

2010-04-20T22:05:00.001-07:00

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/tiajorge

shall we?

2010-03-24T19:27:00.012-07:00

we shall count down the number of classes left until summer break '10. (that just sounds weird- '10)

CLASSES: DONE

FINALS: DONE!

so unbelievably ready for summer. my baby actually gets to be here with me instead of getting deployed in june :] which means i finally get to see him on, or at least close to, his birthday for once. he'll still be going on some MEUs in january or so. i don't remember what that stands for but they go out on boats and go to a bunch of different ports around the world. he says they're trying to bring home the troops so maybe, just maybe, he won't have to go to afghanistan. if he does i'd rather it be sooner than later. just to get it over with. and i really want him to be able to come to my graduation.

also, i think i've decided to be a teacher. i know the decision's a little late but i just don't see myself doing anything else. and this way, i'll be able to save up money to do a study abroad before i get my teaching certificate. i think it would be cool to teach a like lower-level spanish to high schoolers. but right now, my spanish is definitely not good enough for that.

anyways, hope life is going well for anyone that's actually reading this.

peace. ☮

set the fire to the third bar

2010-02-10T22:58:00.001-07:00

i cannot begin to explain how well this song fits my feelings...

I find the map and draw a straight line
Over rivers, farms, and state lines
The distance from 'A' to where you'd be
It's only finger-lengths that I see
I touch the place where I'd find your face
My finger in creases of distant dark places

I hang my coat up in the first bar
There is no peace that I've found so far
The laughter penetrates my silence
As drunken men find flaws in science

Their words mostly noises
Ghosts with just voices
Your words in my memory
Are like music to me

I'm miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
I, I pray that something picks me up
And sets me down in your warm arms

After I have travelled so far
We'd set the fire to the third bar
We'd share each other like an island
Until exhausted, close our eyelids
And dreaming, pick up from
The last place we left off
Your soft skin is weeping
A joy you can't keep in

I'm miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
And I, I pray that something picks me up
and sets me down in your warm arms

I'm miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
and I, I pray that something picks me up
and sets me down in your warm arms

true love conquers all

2010-01-27T23:35:00.000-07:00

i hope it conquers this...

i have had the worst feeling growing in my chest and i can't seem to make it go away.

i wish i could just make things better already.

i know probably nobody reads this but...

2010-01-24T23:05:00.002-07:00

i just really want to put this out there. there's too many people that would freak out if i were to post this on facebook so, here goes...

my boyfriend (cudo) gave me a promise ring on christmas. well technically the ring didn't actually get on to my finger until a couple weeks later due to shipping and resizing but he had told me about it. we've only been back together for about 2 months now but i truly never stopped thinking about him. i put on a big front saying that i'd never be with him again but in reality, i just didn't want things to go back to how they were before we broke up- we were always fighting. and yes, there are times now that we get upset with each other but it is so much better than before. we've already talked about what we want in the future and i just know that i will love him for the rest of my life. at first, we decided that we'd wait until i graduated from college and after his deployment to get married. but now we both feel like we want to get married as soon as possible. but i feel like if we do, i'll be a hypocrite- since so many people have had babies or gotten married since high school, all i've said is how young we still are. and now that i've found love again, i can understand why they did. granted, some people didn't get married for the right reasons but if i do, i know it is because i love him, he loves me, and we can't imagine spending our lives any other way but together. the other concern that i have is my family. he doesn't care what anyone else thinks and would marry me even if my parents were against it. but, i do care what my parents and the rest of my family think. they are so important to me and i don't want to disappoint them in any way. so, he said he would ask my parents' permission before we did anything; which makes me feel a ton better. if they're OK with me getting married right now then i will. if not, i can wait. either way i know we'll be together forever.

please don't leave me without sayin goodbye

2010-01-20T15:36:00.003-07:00

it's only the second week of school and i'm already wishing for summer. but, classes aren't so bad... yet. i've only got class on tuesdays and thursdays. but i haven't decided if that's such a good thing or not yet.

it's been snowing. apparently it rained this morning but i totally missed it due to the fact that i slept in til 11. some of the snow is melting right now but we should get more tonight. i'm really hoping the news people are wrong about us getting 5 feet by the end of the week.

i was so worried about getting a new roommate that i've never met before. but, she's really nice. her name is kristen and she's from scottsdale. she's not creepy. or annoying. so that's good.

NO!

2010-01-08T16:44:00.001-07:00

i don't wanna go back to school! hmph.

i guess i like the fact that i only have classes on tuesdays and thursdays though.

and i hope my new roommate is normal.

and today was a day just like any other

2009-12-04T12:39:00.003-07:00

so i've been listening to jack's mannequin (the old school stuff- everything in transit) and it brings up old memories. sometimes i wish i could go back to those times. it wasn't all easier back then but i really miss the people that i had in my life. but, friends grow apart. whether it's because of distance or new friends or the fact that everyone has changed, it happens. and even though i may want to go back to my old life sometimes, i know it's better to move on and leave the past behind. i don't necessarily believe "everything happens for a reason" but some things do.

on another note- 4 days!!!! 4 days and i am completely done with this semester. I CAN'T WAIT for winter break.

1.

2009-12-01T22:26:00.002-07:00

exactly one week until this semester is over for me.

i can not put in to words how excited i am.

school.

2009-11-03T23:52:00.003-07:00

i wish i knew how to bring up the subject of "i am really unhappy at nau still and don't want to go there anymore" to my parents without breaking down. i tried writing a letter but then i was too chicken to give it to them. last year i asked them about transferring but they said stick it out one more semester, try living in the dorms. and well- i did. flagstaff is just not the place for me. every time i even think about how i'm going to bring this up again i feel like crying. my whole family was so proud of me for getting in and getting scholarships. how can i let them down? but i truly am unhappy here. i mean sure sometimes it's ok; but the majority of the time i just can't wait until i get to go down to phoenix again. i'm there almost every weekend and everyone thinks i'm crazy for it but that is where i feel comfortable. i'm not even sure i even like my major anymore, i really only picked it because i liked it more than everything else. i don't know what to do, i feel so lost.

birthday

2009-10-16T12:36:00.002-07:00

so last weekend i went to phoenix since we were having my birthday party on sunday. which was at dave & buster's by the way- lots of fun. i got an email about the screening of where the wild things are (which was on tuesday night) but was a little sad since i have class until 3:35 and didn't think it would be worth it to drive all the way down to phoenix AGAIN just to see a movie. but then, on tuesday, we got out of my class super early! so i hurried getting my stuff together and headed back down to phoenix. me and my mom went to the screening and it was amazing. i teared up at the end. then the next morning (my actual birthday) my mom took me to breakfast at chick fil a and then i drove back up to flagstaff. after i got out of my lab, i waited for stephanie to get out of hers and then we went to tat-fu! i got two dermal anchors in my lower back. i know, it sounds crazy but i like it. then we got some DQ. and then it was time for me to pick up the present cudo sent for me at lauren's house... it's a necklace. a gold necklace. shaped like a heart. with rhinestones around it. and the marine symbol in the middle. and that's all i want to say about that.

i wonder if i'll ever lose my mind

2009-08-30T19:29:00.004-07:00

first week of sophomore year: done.

classes aren't too bad yet. but i have SO much reading. kickboxing is a lot of fun, and a good workout. i'm diggin my long weekends.

at the moment, i am a little bit obsessed with motion city soundtrack. especially this song-

if life was always easy, it would be boring. but sometimes, i kind of wish it was...

R.I.P. Summer Vacation

2009-08-19T00:03:00.004-07:00

well i'm pretty much all packed up to leave tomorrow. i can't believe how fast the last 3 months have gone. overall i'd say it was a good/fun/memorable summer though. a few rough patches but that's to be expected with any part of life. whatever will i do without alyssa this year? lol. hopefully living in the dorms will make it easier to meet new people. and hopefully i'll meet someone other than skanky boys and potheads. :]

what happens in vegas, stays in vegas...

2009-08-14T00:42:00.003-07:00

except herpes. that sh*t will come back with you. (the hangover)

even though we only spent 2 nights there this time, it was still fun. criss angel's believe show was pretty good. the magic wasn't as *WOW* as i had hoped. but i think that was because i had seen some of the tricks on his tv show already. it was very theatrical though.

this time we went up in the eiffel tower which we've never done before. the view at night is just spectacular. and watching the bellagio's fountain show is really cool from up there.

i can't believe i move back up to flagstaff in just one short week. one.

the happiest place on earth

2009-07-31T14:58:00.008-07:00

we went to:

huntington beach
venice beach
disnelyand
california adventure

all of which were a lot of fun.

i did get a little sunburned though.

going on another mini-vacation

next week to vegas. we are going

to see criss angel's BELIEVE!

i'm really excited for that.

and so the countdown begins...

i move in to aspen in 19 days.

i'm a welcome jack so i get to

move in a day early. better to beat

the crowds, right?

when the world around you crumbles he will be strong, he will be strong

2009-07-03T23:30:00.002-07:00

i knowwww, i kind of suck at this blogging thing. but here are a few things i've learned so far this summer:

even if you really suck at volleyball, it can be really fun
sometimes ex-boyfriends should stay that way
scratch that, pretty much ALL the time they should stay that way
people really love free stuff, especially when it's food
it doesn't hurt to ask
new and different plans for the next year can be really exciting and change your whole perspective of things
it's nice to splurge sometimes- especially after you've worked hard and put up with irritating customers and coworkers for that money
it's a really big deal when a celebrity "king" dies, apparently

When I go down I lift my eyes to you

2009-05-19T19:24:00.003-07:00

so far this summer i haven't done much besides work work work! BUT i do like the fact that i'm gonna get a fatty paycheck this friday. (woo!) this week i've got my brother's 8th grade promotion and i'm also going to goldwater's graduation. i can't believe my brother is going to be in high school and all my little freshman are graduating. yesterday, i went to deer valley high school to make a delivery and they were on lunch. some of them look so little!

p.s.- relient k ♪music♫ makes me extremely happy.

I won't look very far
Cause you'll be there
With open arms
To lift me up again
To lift me up again

2009-05-03T21:45:00.002-07:00

SO today was pretty fun. went downtown and went in a bunch of shops and we went to the lava tubes! unfortunately none of us brought cameras but there's a picture of it from Google. it was really cool in there. at the end we just sat there for a while with our flashlights off- it was so dark and quiet. very peaceful. well i guess i should actually go study some. finals start tomorrow- at 7:30 a.m. for me. but at least summer is almost here! only 3 days left.

Skyway Avenue- We the Kings

2009-04-27T10:34:00.002-07:00

SO i just think this video is way cute

Watch more We the Kings videos on AOL Video

first blog

2009-04-26T17:53:00.004-07:00

SO i'm sitting here on the couch, watching law & order: CI, eatin chicken wings... and i decided to make a blog. hopefully it will get more exciting once summer comes [in 10 days!] but for right now all i've got is my last few days as a freshman at NAU. and let me tell you, flagstaff is not all that exciting. i'm so excited that this semester is coming to an end. i miss phoenix. i miss having money. i miss my friends. i miss my family. i miss my bird. being home for a solid 3 months will be nice.